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Funny Bits

Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.

Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.

A good friend will come and bail you out of jail ... but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Wow ... that was fun!"

I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!

Wouldn't you know it .... Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FAT cells live forever.

Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.