Skip to main content

Romance mathematics & Allied Theories

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.


PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Team Work

Ramo Vigrahavan Dharmah

A great verse from Ramayana: आहार निद्रा भय मैथुनं च  सामान्यमेतत् पशुभिर्नराणाम् । धर्मो हि तेषामधिको विशेष:  धर्मेण हीनाः पशुभिः समानाः ॥ AhAra-nidrA-bhaya-maithunam cha samAnam_etat_pashubhir_narANAm | dharmo hi teShAm adhiko visheSho dharmeNa hInAH pashubhiH samAnAH|| Eating, Sleep, Fear and Sex ; these habits are common between human beings and animals. It is the Dharma which is the special quality of the human beings. Without the Dharma, they are similar to the animals.  Rama is The Embodiment Of Dharma.  Maaricha, while speaking to Ravana- (Aranya Kandam 37-13): रामो विग्रहवान् धर्मः साधुः सत्य पराक्रमः | राजा सर्वस्य लोकस्य देवानाम् इव वासवः || ३-३७-१३|| raamo vigrahavaan dharmaH saadhuH satya paraakramaH | raajaa sarvasya lokasya devaanaam iva vaasavaH || 3-37-13 "Rama is the embodiment of righteousness, he is an equable person with truthfulness as his valour, and as with Indra to all gods he is the king of entire world. [3-37-13] Another great phra

Microsoft moving to Live (Online sofware services)

Microsoft plans to launch Internet-based complements to its core products(Windows and Office), that create opportunities for the company to sell online subscriptions and advertising. Windows Live is a set of Internet-based personal services, such as e-mail, blogging and instant messaging. Office Live will come in both ad-based and subscription versions that augment MS' Office suite. The programs won't replace the paid software but instead seem aimed at capturing its online share. Windows Live at Live.com . From BBC The move to online software services is closely linked to the spread of high-speed access to the internet, as online software services are only as good as a user's access to the web. Mr Gates, who is Microsoft's chairman and chief software architect, said the strategic shift would change his company's approach to doing business: "We are trying to put a 'service plus software' mentality into many of the product groups inside Microsoft."